 29/08/2008 Happy birthday Michael Jackson! So, what did everyone get you? Huh... Debts? Mountains and mountains of debts? Yes, the so-called King of Pop has woken-up today 50 years young and millions of pounds in the red. Well, we knew that anyway right? But here’s the thing:
According to reports, Jackson's spiralling money problems are so large that he may have to sell his Neverland ranch. I know, shocking isn’t it? What’ll happen to the life-size Peter Pan peering from the rafters like a sick voyeur? And what about all those rides and all the gnomes and, oh god, the popcorn machine? Pity the thought…
Anyway, a report in the Mirror this morning claims that Jackson has been helped by a private equity group called Capital Colony. Colony, who owns half of the Las Vegas Hilton, bought a £12.5million loan of Jackson from an investment group hedge fund.
In return Jackson will have to work for his money. In Las Vegas, where the singer has been residing, Colony believes the opportunities are plentiful. A Colony spokesman told the Mirror: "We bought the note and we've been discussing various business opportunities and mutual interests." In short, Colony are there to help...
Some of the opportunities bouncing around include being booked on an annual basis at a Vegas casino, performing up to 180 days a year. Celine Dion did a similar thing, netting £280million pound over a four year period… and we're talking about Celine Dion!!! but Jackson hasn’t performed in years and doesn’t really like to be seen out in public.
I mean, he’s celebrating his birthday eating jelly and ice-cream. Not exactly a day on the slot machines and a steak dinner, is it; followed by a bar crawl and a visit to a seedy bordello?
However, Jacko refuses to sell his Neverland Ranch, despite it being worth well over £200million, so he may have little option other than to come out of hiding and get back in the music game.
Alternatively, he could sell his share of Sony/ATV Music Publishing when his contract expires in two years time. The Mirror claims that Jackson would be able to pay off ALL of his debts and still walk off with £50million; he may have little option.
However, according to the report, Jackson plans to open his Neverland ranch as a theme park for kids. I mean, that’s a no brainer, right? Walk on Dragon’s Den with that little wave of inspiration and Peter Jones and Duncan Bannatyne will be salivating like two teens in an Amsterdam peep-show and handing him a cheque for 300 mill. We think not.
So without further ado, Planet Notion presents a birthday present to Wacko Jacko courtesy of Capital Colony's spokesperson: "We just want him to restore the [Neverland’s] original name, Sycamore Canyon Ranch, and to sell it as quickly as possible." Happy Birthday Michael. We hope you use our present wisely… |
